The blog du jour will discuss something each one of us has extensive experience with. Let me first start by quoting a dear friend of mine. “When you do not expect, you will not be disappointed.” You guessed it. Today’s topic deals with the sore subject of disappointment.
ROSE-COLORED GLASSES
Yes, I own a pair of rose-colored glasses and I wear them as often as humanly possible. I’d like to believe optimism (aka rose colored glasses) is the norm, pessimism is the exception, but realism is, well…realistic. When our rose colored glasses fall off and reality is less than what we desired or expected, we feel disappointed.
HAPPINESS
What is it that will make you truly happy? Is it the job promotion, the important title, possessions, love, wealth, health, beauty, or status? The common misconception is that when we acquire these things, everything else will fall into place. The reality is that the euphoria you experience from acquiring these things is short lived, followed by a feeling of disappointment. Where will the next “high” come from? Researchers describe disappointment as a form of sadness or a painful gap between our expectations and reality. Although painful, disappointment can actually teach us a valuable lesson about ourselves and others.
TRUE BLUE FRIEND
Have you experienced disappointment when your “friend” has been speaking disparagingly about you behind your back? It hurts. How about when a promise is neglected or forgotten? Has a scheduled engagement with someone drawn near, and they either pull a “no show” or have to cancel…again? That sure makes you feel like you matter, doesn’t it? The question becomes, how do we most effectively deal with the disappointment?
GET REAL
If you believe that the agony you feel every step of the way toward your goal will be replaced with a perpetual state of bliss once you achieve it, it may be time for a reality check. Slow down, open yourself up to new possibilities and in the meantime, enjoy the process, even if it means letting go of your expectations.
THE MEANS AND ENDS
Psychology Today reminds us to distinguish between the means and ends, remembering that what we need to do to get what we want may be different from the end result. Consider that there are ways of reaching goals that you may not be aware of. This takes tolerance, practice and patience. Try letting go of your expectations and see if you can lessen your feelings of disappointment.
HDD
We understand that a less than ideal diagnosis or prognosis can be disappointing and down right scary. Ask questions, listen and learn. Put on your rose-colored glasses and look for the possibility of remission, recovery and better health. A positive attitude, science and the power of prayer have been known to produce miracles! If we can help, call us at 505-350-3397.