Today’s blog inspiration comes from a social/business luncheon I recently attended. There were approximately 75 people in attendance. I observed different interactions among the crowd. Some were extroverts and had no problem shaking hands and looking you in the eye. Others felt more comfortable from the safety of their table.
OBSERVATION
I fall into the extrovert category and can make conversation with a rock. Those in the introvert category may want to avoid folks like me like the plague. I observed those who made eye contact and those who chose not to. There is no good, bad, right or wrong, simply an observation in non-verbal communication.
COMMUNICATION
These interactions got me thinking, “I wonder what my eyes are saying?” If asked, I would say my eye contact would convey a welcoming, approachable kind of person. Others might avoid such contact as it could be awkward and uncomfortable. It is a fact that people can communicate with their eyes while never uttering a sound. Our eyes can communicate emotion and interest or lack thereof.
EASY?
Those who looked me in the eye made me feel as though my presence mattered. Seriously, who doesn’t want to feel like they matter? Eye contact may not come easy to everyone. As a matter of fact, it can be downright painful for some. Although it is normal and natural for many of us, it is definitely an acquired skill yet a very important one.
FOR EXAMPLE…
A few years ago, John and I sat in a meeting with a prominent politician here in town. There were three gentlemen in the meeting as well as myself. This politician went on his diatribe, shared eye contact with the other two gentlemen yet not once did he make eye contact with me. My assumption was that he didn’t desire my presence. Perhaps that wasn’t his intention but that’s what his lack of eye contact conveyed to me. To this day when I hear his name, I’m simply not a fan.
VITAL
Eye contact during a conversation is vital (crucial really) and shows attentiveness and interest in what is being said. Similar to a conversation, eye contact goes back and forth between those who are engaged in a discussion.
INTERESTING
An interesting fact from www.betterup.com says research has shown that eye contact activates the limbic mirror system. This means that the same neurons that are firing in someone’s brain will also fire in yours when you share eye contact with them. Interesting! Eye contact shows and earns respect. Looking away too quickly when you break eye contact can make you appear nervous, shy or lack confidence.
HDD
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